Saturday, June 24, 2017

Life Lately | House Hunting, Blogger's Block & Lemon Socks ♥

If there's one apt word to describe my life lately it's stressful. We ended our holiday on a low note (after also beginning it on a low note - losing four days off it due to Tyler's passport being out of date and none of us realising until the night before we were due to fly...), with our landlord phoning us at 8.30 at night (a very strange time to call anyone with bad news, in my opinion anyway) to tell us he was selling the house we're living in.

Cue all the negative feelings you could possibly muster into one person at one time - shock, worry, panic, sadness, stress, fear... not the way we were wanting to feel on the last night of our holiday. I tried to soften the blow for Jacek, telling him that it could be worse, that the phonecall could have been about one of our loved ones dying and that we were simply having to move house. We also awoke the next morning to the news about the Grenfell fire and that really helped to put things into perspective for us. However, the panic of worry and impending homelessness due to no available houses to rent in our area really has taken it's toll on us these past couple of weeks.

We have viewed a house though - thanks to me putting a shoutout on my personal Facebook asking for people to get in touch if they knew of anyone renting, and we're going to take it, even though it's only available for a year (we'd have much preferred a long-term letting so we won't have to be in this position again this time next year...) and €300 more than we're currently paying.

We contemplated moving somewhere new, even to a whole new country - both of which I would have very much been up for, but Jacek wasn't. He's already moved from South Africa to Ireland and I don't think he'll ever be up for relocating again. Plus, we've only just moved Tyler to a lovely new preschool. It's in the countryside and the teachers are so lovely there, he's settled in so well and after all the trouble we encountered with him in his last school it was an absolute relief, so the thought of unsettling him again really wasn't an option for us.

Jacek met with a financial advisor this week and it seems as though it'll be another two or three years before we're even in a position to go for our own mortgage - yet we're able to pay €12,000 in rent - ludacris to say the least! We have to make wills - I laughed at that one, what am I supposed to 'leave' people, my collection of postcards?!

Anyway, we'll get there in the end I'm sure and will one day be homeowners, but I can't help but think we've just done everything assways. Now don't get me wrong, I love our boys dearly and I wouldn't change them for the world, I just wish we had established ourselves more in our careers and in owning our own house before we brought them into this world - isn't hindsight a wonderful (awful) thing? I've always had this hippie-dippie perspective that 'everything will work itself out in the end', but in reality, I should have thought about life more seriously before now.

We came off the back of our holiday with Jacek working six days. He's gone over twenty-four hours without seeing myself and the boys and I'm left wondering if it's even worth going on holiday at all when he's punished with six-day weeks anytime we get back? I'm also left feeling like a single mother to the boys, getting up with them, minding them all day and then putting them to bed on my own each and everyday. It's not only hard but it's also so lonely - single mothers, I comend you.

On top of everything my blogging mojo has also disappeared (please come back!). I'm finding myself constantly stuck on what to write, resigning myself to the fact that no one really cares about what I have to say or share. Everyone else always seems far more interesting or cool (yes, I do use the word cool, further proof that I'm uncool!) and my life just seems so boring compared to everyone elses and I know, 'never compare yourself to anyone else' and all that jazz, but honestly, in the blogging world that's a very hard thing to avoid!

I'm sure I'll come back one day with somethig interesting and amazing, but until then I'll just keep lulling along. These days I can't even pick up my camera because I feel my photography is so mediocre. I need to do a course, learn more technique and better editing skills. I thought that being self-taught would cut it, but I don't think it will in time.

The weather has been gloriously sunny so we've been trying to spend as much time in the garden as possible and I'm realising that all the beautiful handmade rompers I got for Beau is sport this summer, are so impractical for a crawling baby in a gravelled garden... his poor knees! I've resorted to having to put him in 'crawling pants' (crappy cheap joggers from Penneys that I don't mind him getting filthy) and so far they're working, even though he ends up boiling in them in the 22 degree heat.

I took the boys to my parents garden during the week and Beau was only gorgeous in his little Peter Rabbit handmade romper and lemon knee-high socks! Is it strange for a pair of socks to make me so happy? I think they're just the most darling things and I'm so glad I found them for so cheap on AliExpress. They remind me of the school socks I used to wear back when I was small - oh the nostalgia. Plus, lemon coloured anything makes my heart happy.

I realise that this life lately update has been quite a negative one, but it's been a time, let me tell you! These past few weeks have been hard and I really wasn't prepared or expecting them at all. It'll all be okay though, I'm sure of it. We may not have our own house, or a house to rent for very long at all (I've discovered that a year is actually a very short space of time the older I get), but we have sunny days, adorable socks and each other and ultimately, it's the latter that's all that really matters.

2 comments

  1. Fíona a fellow Irish Renter and blogger here who follows you because your photography is awesome and I admire you. Feeling down while in this amount of stress is totally normal, doubting yourself is normal. I hope you find somewhere, I know how difficult it is renting in Ireland sucks currently. All I want it a little house of my own in the country but the Lotto is the only way that will happen! Oh and your not the only on that did things arse ways lol

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    1. Thanks so much for your kind words Amber. We've found somewhere for now but only for 11 months. The rental situation is outrageous at the moment too. Hoping for a lotto win for us both!

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