Friday, July 14, 2017

Life Lately | Packing Up, Blogging Woes & Floral Faffery ♥

It's been a strange few weeks. Definitely not the way I was expecting us to spend our summer. I had hoped for a summer of exploring new places around the country, taking lots of pictures of my boys together and being able to enjoy the long, hazy summer evenings - without having to stick to the boys rigid bedtime. It's quite safe to say that nothing has worked out the way I hoped it would.

I have been spending my days packing up all our things into storage boxes and choosing things to donate to charity. I'm one of those people who finds it extremely hard to part with things. I know they're just 'things', but it's the sentimentality attached to them that I can't let go and I find myself clutching onto the baby cardigans and blankets for dear life "just in case we have another" or because "I'll give them to my grandchildren someday". I'm twenty bloody seven, grandchild are a lifetime away. It's ridiculous.

Honestly though, I can't even begin to explain the frustration I feel at even having to give away these things and having to stay stuck in a very expensive rental market we don't even want to be a part of, just because a mortgage is so hard to get - even though we've proven we can afford it. I'm a whole mixture of emotions regarding the whole situation, but frustration is definitely topping off everything I'm feeling at the moment.

I think it may be because of all the crap we're going through at the moment, but blogging is something which is becoming increasingly difficult for me. Not only is it impossible to find the time to blog without feeling like I'm neglecting my children, but I also feel as though I have nothing worthwhile to say.

I'm in a period of my life where I feel so defeated about everything and even though I look for inspiration on a daily basis, I just can't find it. The blogging world has changed a lot since I began over four years a go and in my opinion, it hasn't been for the better.

There are some lovely, helpful bloggers out there, who really would give their heart and soul to help another out and are such forces within this online community we've all found ourselves in, but then there are the others who will literally dance on top of peoples heads to get to the top and I just can't be part of all that. I hate the competition and that is why I'll never be a popular blogger.

I've contemplated giving up, but I don't want to give up documenting my family's life together. After all, that's why I began this whole online adventure in the first place. So if I can just ignore all the jargon of DA, PA, GA, etc. etc. and concentrate on me and mine, then maybe I can make blogging something I enjoy once again.

It's no secret that I love to photograph flowers and these gorgeous summer months make for the most wonderful of times to capture beautiful blooms on camera. Apart from the outdoor flowers though, I've also been doing some floral faffery inside, making little flatlays with flowers as the main attraction.

It's quite silly but I actually love laying them all out and photographing them. It also helps when your friend lets you have full reign over their hydrangea bushes! Although, I've learnt that hydrangeas really don't last too long before wilting - boo to that.

Hopefully my next 'Life Lately' post will have a more positive tone. I'm sure my last post also had a bit of a downer vibe. I think it's important to document the reality of our lives too though, as much as I'd like to portray everything as if it had come out of a fairytale...

6 comments

  1. Keep looking to the future Fi, and I know it's sounds glib, but count your blessings, girl! Look at what you have, what you have achieved so far. I've spent the last couple of weeks & still haven't finished, going through all of my Dad's 'stuff'. A war baby, he threw nothing away & his stuff moved with us more than 15 times. It's been really sad and hard having to part with some things, but you know, at the end of the day I would throw the lot in the skip just to have another hour with him. 'Things' are just that, family and friends grow older and move on, but memories and love - they're ours to keep.

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    1. Thank you Kate. I'm so sorry for your loss, it must be so hard. I wish I could give you that hour with your Dad. You're so right and have really put things into perspective for me. Lots of love to you x

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  2. Oh, and another thing! Re. hydrangeas: keep them in the fridge or even in a bag in the freezer until you're ready to photograph/play with them and you'll find they last longer!

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    1. Thank you for the tip Kate, I'll definitely try that next time x

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  3. Hi I just wanted to say I was drawn to your blog when the title said blogging woes and after reading it I feel I can totally relate to not knowing what to write, feeling like giving up and pressure from competition. Since have my third baby I've discovered mum tubers and tried to grow my Instagram account. While I never want to vlog I used to enjoy Instagram and blogging. Now I find myself constantly watching my follower count, looking at other Insta mums pictures that make me feel rubbish and like I want to delete all my accounts because I can't keep up with everyone else. And most of all I'm not enjoying it anymore :/

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    1. Hello, thank you so much for reading and for taking the time to leave a comment, I really appreciate it. I'm so sorry you've felt this way with blogging too, it can be hard going, can't it? I don't think anyone realises just how much the blogging world makes you compare yourself to others and at times it can be absolutely soul destroying. Hang in there though, blog for you and only you. Document your memories and use your blog and social media as a scrapbook of your life. That's what I've been trying to do lately and I feel much better for it.

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