Wednesday, May 06, 2015

The Baby Days Are Over... ♥

My little baby boy, when I wasn't good with a camera, nor did I care so much about such trivial things such as, what he wore or what way his blanket was facing... what have I turned into?!
The baby days are over,
They really don't last long,
And now I sit here longing,
For days that have long gone.

I miss your tiny body,
Curled up in my arms,
A sleeping angel, sweetly dreaming,
The most perfect of all lifes charms.

A baby is a blessing,
A gift that should not be rushed,
Milestone after milestone over,
Skills I wish I hadn't pushed.

I no longer have a baby,
But a toddler with a stride,
Who runs away at fast speeds,
Or who is always glued by my side.

You no longer let me carry you,
Or hold you in my arms,
You're a wriggling little boy now,
Who bowls me over with his charms.

I'm such a silly mummy,
Thinking all these things,
And how sad I am that you're growing up,
And spreading your curious wings.

I wish I had taken the time,
To enjoy your early days more,
If only I had truly known,
Just how much I would miss them when they were no more.

So my little boy,
Please stop growing up so fast,
My days with you go by so quickly,
I want these toddler days to last.

Please hold Mummy's hand,
And cuddle me some more,
I need some loving too, you know,
From the person I most adore.

I think you might have guessed, my little love,
That I'm quite emotional tonight,
But knowing I have you to make me smile tomorrow,
Means that life is looking bright.

So, sweet dreams my darling,
You're my most perfect accomplishment ever,
No one compares to you little babe,
Even though you have grown up too quickly, you'll have your Mummy's love forever.

I really don't know what's wrong with me tonight. I've gone to bed at half seven, have sit aimlessly pinning things on Pinterest and suddenly I came across a picture of my son and I, from when he was two months old and it's hit me, he's growing up so fast and there's nothing I can do to stop it. I am so emotional right now it's not even funny, looking back on old baby photos of days I have long forgotten and seeing just how much he has changed, I just can't cope. 

Tonight was hard. He screamed and screamed being put to bed and when times like this happen I just feel so useless and so unhelpful to him. I hate seeing him so upset and not knowing what's wrong - in his baby days I always knew what was wrong.

I wish I had cherished his baby days fully, I wish I hadn't rushed our life together away. No one makes me feel more loved than that boy of mine and even though life can be hard with him sometimes (those tantrums are the worst...) I just wouldn't change anything about him for the world.

I know I'm such a silly woman, sitting here shedding tears about my perfectly healthy son who will greet me in the morning with a big smile on his face, saying "Mummy's here" to me but it's so hard thinking that he could be my one and only child (due to things which have happened in the past) and the time has just gone by too quickly, marred and muddled by my stupid post-natal depression and anxiety, which stole my life for such a long time. I feel like these things stole my memories with my son too, times I will never get back.

I think all mothers go through this at some stage, don't they? The emotional days of realising that their baby is no longer a baby and may not need them as much as they used to. I need to relish the days of him being my shadow, or even the times when he runs away like a gale force wind and requires me to chase after him - oh the embarrassment of me not being able to catch up with him when he's only got little legs... Instead of worrying and filling my time with things that don't matter.

I can no longer take my days with him for granted. Not when he fills me with emotion and makes me want to write poetry for him. That, ladies and gentlemen, is a mothers love - irreplaceable and oh so deep, forever.

P.S. My son woke up as I was finishing this post, gave me a quick cuddle and is now sleeping soundly next to me. This boy knows when his Mummy needs him. Cue more tears looking at his sweet curls and little hands next to me...


  1. Such a lovely and honest post. It scares me how quickly they grow. Darcie turns three next month and I'm just not ready for her to be three!

    Kay xxx

  2. I'm feckin' crying here now too! Lovely post.

  3. Lovely post! Got me emotional too. My 4 months old baby is sleeping and I just want to wake him up and cuddle him. Thank you for writing this post and making us stop and cherish the moment

  4. oh you made me cry too, lovely post and poem, I feel the same, and my 'baby' is now 22years old! xx

  5. Oh Hun you aren't silly. Every mum goes rough this. My ds1 turned 4 last week and I always go through spates of crying about how boyish he seems. Even ds2 I blinked and he is 6.5 months! He is grabbing, yelling , babbling, trying to crawl, my newborn squish has grown up. As my last baby I do get sentimental about it. Who am I kidding I'm a sentimental person so I've always been like this about time passing us by!

  6. Sobbing here! Beautiful Fi 💜

  7. Such a lovely post :) My eldest is now 6 and it only seems like yesterday that she was a baby :(

    Emily xx

  8. They really do grow up too quickly! My daughter is 20 and graduating from community college in 9 days! She will go on for her bachelors and possibly masters, so I still have her for a short time yet! My baby is 17! The time goes so fast. Enjoy every second!

  9. Watching the kids grow up before your eyes is really hard. It's not silly at all to fell sad about it. I routinely tell my 13 year old nephew (who I've helped raise since he was born) to stop growing!

  10. My boys are now 7 & 10 and I have NO idea how that happened. It feels like I was just bringing them home from the hospital last week.

  11. This post made me cry :-/ thinking the same, that my baby girl is no a baby no more. Thanks for the beautiful post :)

  12. I don't have children, but I can relate to the post with my cat. I've had him since he was 5 weeks old and now he's 12. We moved across an ocean together and he was my only friend when I didn't know a soul in this country and sometimes I cry knowing that the creature I've spent most of my adult years with is more than halfway through our time together :(

    I just love him so much.

  13. Oh baby days :( My Mother in Law and I were looking at baby pics of my husband the other day and she was getting a little sad over it! :(

  14. Beautiful post and not silly at all, I get days like this when it just hits me how big the girls have gotten and how quickly time goes by, we try so hard to cherish every moment but time always gets the better of us. Beautiful poem xx

  15. Aw, what a lovely post! My kids are teens and older. My oldest has a baby of his. He is 10 months. Being able to cuddle with my grandson brings back memories of when he was that small.

  16. What a sweet post. I was just thinking about how big my boys are (almost 4 and 2) and was just taking advantage of a rare cuddle session with my two year old. Since they are always on the go, they hardly ever want to cuddle and I miss it so much. At least I have a cuddly dog!


  17. This is such a lovely post. I have two daughters ages 4 and 6. I'm not sure if I want another or not, but I do love babies. They sure don't stay little for long!

  18. What a lovely post. You aren't silly at all, I'm a mom of 6 and still get upset thinking about the baby days being almost over here. They grow up so fast, and I feel sometimes TOO fast and I want to just HAULT the time for a little bit and enjoy it, and stay in the moment. I often spend a lot of time thinking about it and in tears myself.... Wish time could just slow down a bit. - - - Jeanine

  19. My oldest two are teenagers now, and I miss every age and stage that they've gone through. What I've found though, is that I'm often so busy either missing the younger years or pushing them toward the next milestone, that I forget to pause and enjoy the present. Every age has such wonderful things about it to enjoy! I know just how you feel :-)

  20. I can completely relate to your emotional messy state right now. I'm also going through the very similar thing dealing with the fact that my kids are growing up way to fast in front of me. My last child is leaving the toddler stage, and I'm not ready for it. I want to keep her little longer, and I want to keep my Momma's boy as my Momma's boy as long as I can too. In my case, it's my oldest child going through the preteen attitude stage that is sparking my dramatic emotional ride.

    I'm glad to hear that you're coming out of your depression stage and starting to be able to fully enjoy your little man. This is a great post and was enjoyable to read knowing that we do really all go through it.

  21. This is such a beautiful poem! There is no mistaking that you love your son very much! The world needs more women like you to love and care for their children!

  22. This post captures the true essence of motherhood. The ups and downs ... the sweet and sad. We let go of their little hands for just a second and POOF! They're all grown up.

  23. It's been said that when a baby is born, the mother is born again. Welcome to the new life of caring and loving. Being a mom is truly difficult and we just hope that the kids will realize someday how much effort has been put into making them safe and protected.

  24. Awe! how sweet! I don't often long for those days back (cause they were hard work) but just the other night I thought "I will never have a baby again.." weird! I think we all long as some point to snuggle a newborn! Maybe it's time for more kids ;) xox Christine | Amidst the Chaos

  25. Sometimes my mom feels the same way about us. When she thinks about how we have grown up now, she often recalls our childhood memories that cannot get back. The good thing is that we have some photos to remember them.

  26. It sounds like you are really treasuring each day you have with him now. Whether or not he is your last baby, you've got a sweet little doll there!

  27. How precious! I swear - I blinked my eyes and my babies were all grown up. One of them has babies of her own now. Seems like yesterday they were swaddled in their blankets.

  28. This is an awesome post indeed and your son is so adorable. I am going to be emotional next month when my baby get his High School diploma. They truly do grow up so fast but no matter what they all still need mom but just in different ways. Thanks for sharing.

  29. This is such a beautiful post - I also feel the same way about my son and wish I would have just taken more time to really enjoy when he was super little!

  30. All mothers definitely go through this stage! It's so hard to realize that your "baby" really isn't a baby anymore.

  31. <3 You are not silly at all! You answered your own question, I think: we DO all go through this, and I don't think it stops with the baby stage! It still happens to me with every milestone (oldest is almost 7)…when he wanted me to stop walking him into Kindergarten, when he wanted to wash his own hair…all those little things take him a bit further from me, but deeper into my heart!

  32. My kids have grown up so fast. It is amazing just how quickly the time fly's by. It feels like yesterday they were tiny little babies. Now i have a 20 year old finishing his first year of college and a 17 year old going into her first year of college.

  33. My son is about to turn three, and I have so many feelings about this! He is about to start school and is going to be such a big kid now!

  34. You have me in tears. My son just turned 17 and I wish I could turn back time. I miss those baby days.

  35. Time really does fly by, and from what I've seen in your posts and photos – you are certainly making up for what you feel is lost time, and doing a fabulous job of creating sweet memories with your son. The ending of this post is utterly too sweet…lil' ones do have that kind of sixth sense, don't they?

  36. that is so sweet. it's crazy on how fast our kids grow up!

  37. This is truly such a beautiful post, the emotions you've given me through this are insane. It's made me think about my own child so much and all I have gone through!

  38. Thank you for such an amazing poem! I totally love the picture too (who wouldn't want to cuddle with that baby!)

  39. You wrote the poem? Oh my gosh, you have amazing writing skills. It is so true the baby days fly. With my first child I feel like I can still feel the day so fresh and new, but when my twins came I was stirring and hustling and bustling it is so hard for me to remember those days. That makes me sad, but I get lots of cuddles now ( they turned 8 a few days ago ) and I am cherishing those moments.


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