Sunday, March 15, 2015

Being A Mother | What Does It Mean To Me? ♥

The love of my life.
 Today is Mother's Day, a day where all mothers are to be celebrated, shown how much they are loved and adorned with gifts - if my Facebook and Instagram timelines are to be believed that is... I wrote a post about what Mother's Day means to me last year and one year on I still feel the same way. Even though it is nice to be showered with gifts and goodies from time to time, this is not what Mother's Day is about for me, nor, in my humble opinion, should it be for anyone else.

Why would I need expensive perfume, makeup, chocolates, flowers and all other sorts of pretty things just so my son (and his father, because lets face it, although my son is quite a clever clogs he hasn't quite yet learnt how to go to the shop on his own yet...) can justify his love for me? Like many other special days throughout the year, Mother's Day has sadly become a competition of 'look what I got', losing the true meaning of the day and all that it's about - our children and love for our own mothers, grandmothers and godmothers. I woke up this morning with no card or gifts. I let my fiance have a lie in and got up with my son because as his mother that is my duty, what I do most days without fail (unless his father is on a late shift and obliging of course) and what he expects of me. I did get some cuddles, although I think they may have been spurred on by the fact that I had chocolate... that boy would do anything for a square of chocolate and his sloppy toddler kiss was the highlight of my day. I did not expect anything and today was just like any other day. I do not need anything for my son to show me he loves me, he does this everyday with his affection towards me and simply by brightening my life with his presence.

Before my fiance went to work I did get some gifts, nothing expensive, just sweet, symbolic gestures which he knows I love. I shall not be sharing these because why would I feel the need to? They are between my boy, him and I and I don't need to parade them to the world to show that I am loved. I think as the age of social media grows people have been accustomed to 'over-sharing', it seems as though nothing is private, secret or beloved these days and it makes me dread the future and long for my childhood days of the 90's where everything was so much simpler and not so boastful or competition like. The older I get the more I realise that the materialistic things really don't matter. As I child I longed for time spent with my father, something I didn't really get much of and this lack of time is what sticks in my mind a lot more than the gifts or holidays he took me on. Looking back at pictures of my mam and I, I am reminded of all she done for my brother and I, not what she got us and although we haven't always seen eye to eye, she is my mother and the time I spend with her is precious. I want my son to cherish the time he has with his father and I. I want him to know what's really important in life, that it doesn't matter what we have, as long as we are all happy together and have the love of those around us then that is all that matters. I am too old (and poor) to be bothered with all this 'keeping up with the Jones' ' lark. Of course, I'm not a begrudging Beatrice and am very happy for those who received lovely gifts today, I'm just one of those Mother's who would prefer a cuddle, kiss or a wildflower picked by my child in the garden over lavish gifts that cost so much, to me, it's the simplest gestures that take up the biggest room in our hearts.

So what is 'being a mother', what does it all mean to me?
Being a mother means putting my child's needs before my own even if I'm exhausted, hungry or feeling unbelievably ill.
It means feelings of constant worry that will never end.
It means not being repulsed by not having a tissue and having to wipe your child's snotty nose with your own hand just so they can look presentable and have a clear nose (this is something I never thought I be able to do!)
Being a mother means learning the art of patience.
Being a mother means showing kindness whenever you can but also learning to be strict when you have to be.
It means being tolerant of your child, their needs, loves and hates in life.
It means loving your child no matter what.
Being a mother means being appreciative of your child, not everyone who wants to be a parent is lucky enough to experience it for themselves.
It means means being thankful of the little soul who chose you to be it's mother.
It means getting up each morning and being responsible for another human being.
It means being a jack of all trades, some that you probably believed that you could never do.
It means being a guardian of another life, showing them right from wrong and steering them on the right path.
It means putting your child's happiness before your own.
Being a mother means having to transition your life to suit your child's needs.
It means loneliness sometimes, although getting a cuddle from your little one should clear this up.
It means a lot of hard work and no end to the wishes, wants and needs of your child.
Being a mother means providing for your child as best you can, sometimes going without yourself just so they can be happy and nourished.
It means loving and caring for your child no matter where they may be in the world or in Heaven. Remember, just because you may not be able to see your children, this does not make you any less of a mother.
Being a mother is about experiencing unconditional love, a love which is so intense that it can make you cry and be extremely happy at the same time.

Happy Mother's Day to all the mothers out there, remember the important things in life and show your child today just how much you love and appreciate them.


  1. Thank you for such a great post! I absolutely agree with you with all sentence but happiness of being mum is much more than all troubles :)

    1. Thank you for reading Oksana. Definitely right, the happiness of being a mother far outweighs all the worries :)

  2. Happy Mother's Day. :) This is a great post and I totally agree with you, Mother's Day is so much more than epensive gifts and showing everyone what you've got. My parents divorced when I was little and spending time with my father has always been one of the thigs I've missed, more than anything else.

  3. Your post was beautifully written and I agree with everything that you said. I had tears when I read it because it sums up everything I feel.

  4. I just discovered you! ☺ You have a beautiful family. What delightful and touching post! ♥

  5. Your post is very good because a mother is unique, i agree with everything that you said.
    Great post ♡♡♡

  6. So very well put. Being a mom is a blessing.

  7. Great post, Fiona, thank you!
    Happy Mother's Day!:)

  8. This is a great post! I love the idea of heartfelt gifts too instead of anything grand or expensive. Family is rally all that matters in life.

  9. Happy Mothers Day. I too don't care for gifts (but I must admit I would give them grief if they gave me nothing!) but I love the care I get on Mothers day now they are older. I love tea being offered regularly and dinner being made, but most of all as you have so eloquently described I love knowing I'm a Mother.

  10. Being a mother is something difficult, but great too! So lovely post :)
    Happy Mother's Day!

  11. Beautifully written Fiona, I had a lump in my throat just reading it. Sadly children weren't to be for me but I am an auntie and have had the best of both worlds for 18 years, enjoying R's company & then handing her back! I have been truly blessed to see this person grow from a newborn to loving Tinky Winky, to the moody Goth she is now!

  12. Being a mother is the best job in the world, there is no other that's so demaning as well as rewarding!!!!

  13. Happy Mother's day, Fiona! I choked up reading your ode to motherhood- very,very touching especially the part where you say, "It means not being repulsed by not having a tissue and having to wipe your child's snotty nose with your own hand"...can totally relate to that..
    Take a bow, all you selfless mamas of the world :)

  14. Oh that is lovely to read :) My babies are all grown up now (19 year old boy/girl twins) but they will always be my babies. xx

  15. what a lovely post, I hope you have an amazing Mother's Day with ur boy..

  16. i got a candle from Heatons, and i love it, now i did hand it to hubby to go up to the till with it so that i felt he bought it lol but that's all i need too, not big expensive things

  17. You are so sweet and your words are lovely :)
    Tyler is a lucky child because he has such an amazing mummy :) ♥
    You are super cute together! **

  18. Great article, very interesting. Love to be a mom <3

  19. Putting your childs needs before your own is the best motto ever.


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